The Secret Life of the Manic Depressive

On the whole I don't watch television (I don't see the point as nothing will ever, ever be as good as "Buffy the Vampire Slayer"), but once in a blue moon I see something that will completely blow my little mind.

Deep

*Warning:  The contents of this blog may not be for everyone.  It is by far the most real post I have ever written.  It is not my intention to cause alarm or upset anybody.  My only intention is to share my story in the hope that it will help others in a similar position.*

Paranoid Pants on Fire

"Paranoia will get you through times of no enemies better than enemies will get you through times of no paranoia"
 ~ Pete Granger

"The truly paranoid are clever enough to not act paranoid." 
~ Star Trek

Wonky Head & Lambada Lungs

Did you miss me?

You may or may not have noticed that I haven't exactly been on top blogging form of late.  For those very few of you who have taken the time to follow me (you lovely, lovely people x), I thought I'd better check in and let you know that I am still alive and give a little explanation...

Ebby

When I was very young, my best friend in the whole wide world was a little boy named Ebby.  He was my age with short brown hair, big brown eyes, and he always wore a knitted yellow jumper, blue jeans and red wellington boots.  We'd run around playing hide and seek, dig holes in the garden or just sit chatting and singing for hours on end.  He was a cheeky thing and sometimes got me in to trouble with his wild escapades, but I didn't care.  I loved Ebby to death.  There was just one problem; I didn't realize that Ebby didn't exist.

My Little Black Rain Cloud

The best way I can think of to describe depression is that it's kind of like a fluffy cloud that surrounds your entire being.  No one can see it or feel it, but it's always there.  Sometimes it's as thick as molasses and no one can reach through it.  Other times it's like a thin mist and even you forget it's there.  But it is there, just on the edge of your peripheral vision, waiting to make its presence know when you least expect it.  A bit like Jaws.